That’s So Gay

I am a big gay. And since today is National Coming Out Day, I thought I would make a big note of it. Most, if not all, of the people in my life know that I am a lesbian, so I’m not sure I have anyone to come out to on Coming Out Day. (See Gay, Gay, Gay, posted on April 23, 2010 and I Need a Lesbian Lawyer, posted March 25, 2010).

My friend Shauna, who is not a big gay, updated her Facebook status to show support for the gays. She wrote on her status update that she “is a straight ally and today is National Coming Out Day. I’m coming out for lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender equality because it’s 2010 and almost 90% of LGBT youth experience harassment in school, and too many lives have been lost.”

I posted a comment on her status update in response, “That’s so gay.”

Shauna seemed to like that comment a lot because then she wrote on my wall, “You know what I think I’m going to do? Start using that phrase for when things are really cool. As in, Hey, great job on your paper! It was so gay! And, Wow. Beautiful dog. She’s… so gay! And maybe even, Congratulations on your nuptials! That’s so gay! Do you think it’ll catch on?” she asked.

I told her I did think it would catch on. “Oh yes,” I replied. “I do think it will catch on.” And then I suggested she also try, “You’re acting like a gay.”

She really liked that suggestion too, but asked for clarification. “As in, Hey, that was quite eloquent. You’re acting like a gay?

Then our friend Liz chimed in and said, “This conversation is so gay! Did I use it correctly?” she wanted to know.

I commended them both on their usage of the term. “Good job girls. You are both being über gay.”

I also had another suggestion for Shauna. “You can also use a variation and say: Wow. Are you a gay?

Or if the person is really interesting, I suggested, “Wow. Are you a BIG gay?

Here I am (on the left) acting like a big gay in earlier days.

Surina Khan Cook: Bruschetta

Day old crusty bread is good for a lot of things. Today I’m making bruschetta. A few years ago, Jenny and I went to a dinner party where the host served a delicious bruschetta. It seemed to be made with swiss cheese and carmelized onions.

“How did you make this?” I asked our host.

“It’s bruschetta,” he responded.

“Yes, I see that. It’s delicious. Did you caramelize the onions?” I asked. “And what about the bread, did you toast it first, or all together with the cheese and onions?”

“Oh, it’s just a simple bruschetta,” he said evasively, not telling me anything I needed to know about the ingredients or baking process.

“I can’t believe he wouldn’t tell me how he made the bruschetta,” I complained to Jenny on the way home. “I’m going to make my own bruschetta,” I declared.

Since then I’ve sampled many varieties of bruschetta. My favorite is from the Farmer’s Market in Gualala, a small town on the Mendocino/Sonoma coast. I’ve recreated a version of it since first tasting it about three years ago. The ingredients and the measurements are not exact, which makes it all the more appealing, to taste and to make. You can mix just about anything together, as long as it is fresh, and it will taste good. So if you’re out of rosemary, don’t make a special trip to the market. It will taste just as good with parsley and thyme. And any cheese will work well, though I do like a little blue cheese mixed in with whatever cheeses happen to be lingering in the fridge.

This will become bruschetta.

Day old bread (a french baguette or an Italian loaf works well)
2 tablespoons olive oil
2 large onions
1 tablespoon chopped fresh rosemary
1 tablespoon chopped fresh thyme
2 tablespoons chopped fresh parsley
1 tablespoon chopped garlic
a variety of grated or crumbled cheeses (cheddar, blue, parmesan, asiago or just about anything you have in the fridge will do)
olive tapendade

slice the onions and caramelize on medium or medium low heat in the olive oil (careful not to burn or crisp any of the onion)

when the onions turn a rich brown, take off heat and let cool

carmelized onions

preheat oven to 375 degrees

combine chopped rosemary, thyme, parsley, garlic, cheeses (grated or crumbled), and olive tapenade in a bowl and mix together

mix everything together in a bowl

add onions after they have cooled

place a piece of parchment paper on a cookie sheet

slice the bread (1/4 inch slices), and place on cookie sheet

top each slice with cheese mixture and bake in preheated 375 degree oven until cheese is melted and browned

ready to go in the oven

Serve warm or at room temperature with a chilled sparkling shiraz or any other refreshing beverage.

garnish with rosemary or other herbs and enjoy.

Surina Khan Cook: Bolognese

I’m making Bolognese tonight. The heat wave in SoCal has almost broken. Yesterday’s dental trauma in the form of a root canal is healing, thanks to the good Doctor’s advice.

“Take vicoden as needed,” Dr, Chin told me as I was getting up from the procedure. The vicoden helps the pain and makes me crave comfort food.

“What should I get from the farmer’s market?” Jenny asks me on most Friday’s. I am usually stuck at my desk with the phone to my ear while she is free to go to the market.

I tell her not to buy too much since I am traveling all next week. “Don’t buy too much, since I will be gone most of next week for work,” I remind her. “I’m craving Bolognese,” I add.

And so begins the grocery list for the Bolognese ingredients:

1 tablespoon olive oil
1 large yellow onion, chopped
a teaspoon (or more to taste) of crushed red pepper
1 head of garlic, peeled and chopped
1 lb mild italian sausage, in bulk
1-2 cups red wine
1 1/2 cup heavy cream
oregano
bay leaves
8 oz can of fire roasted tomatoes
8 oz pasta (garlic and herb fettuccine from Trader Joes)
1 bunch of fresh parsley, chopped as a garnish
fresh Parmesan cheese, grated as a garnish
crusty french bread

Bolognese ingredients from the market.

In fact, it being Friday, we may as well purchase several bottles of red wine. I suggest a combination of old vine zins, riojos, cabernets, syrahs and a few bottles of prosecco since it’s still warm out and it’s nice to start the evening with a chilled fizzy beverage.

I start the bolognese by prepping the ingredients, which also might involve pouring myself a glass of prosecco and sipping slowly.

prep the ingredients by chopping onions, garlic, parsley. also some grated cheese, oregano, bay leaves and tomatoes.

And then:

on medium high heat, sauté the onions (with a sprinkle of crushed red pepper) in a tablespoon or two of olive oil until they are slightly browned

sauté the onions with some crushed red peppers.

add chopped garlic, sauté for 1 minute

add mild Italian bulk pork sausage (remove from casing), saute until browned, breaking into pieces

add 1 1/2 – 2 cups of red wine and cook on medium high until wine reduces

I added a cup and a half of red zinfandel.

add 1 1/2 cup of heavy cream, bring to boil

add 8 oz can of fire roasted tomatoes

add 1-2 tablespoons of dried oregano

add 2 bay leaves

with the tomatoes, oregano and bay leaves.

simmer on medium or medium low for at least 2 hours and as much as 4 hours.

Spoon off extra grease as needed.

Pour another glass of prosecco and sip slowly. Proceed to back deck and enjoy the evening air. Snack on some olive tapenade, enhanced with fresh chopped thyme, parsley and crushed garlic. Served with warm toasted bread brushed with olive oil and fresh ground black pepper.

When the prosecco bottle is empty, open a bottle of red wine as you continue to simmer the Bolognese. When feeling slightly tipsy, return inside. Continue to spoon off extra grease. Taste Bolognese sauce. Is it turning a rich maroon color? Good. Top it off with the remaining half cup of wine for a richer flavor. Add salt and black pepper to taste. Go back out to deck and continue sipping wine, until you’re ready to cook the pasta.

boil pasta and drain
add pasta to Bolognese sauce
let pasta and sauce co-mingle for a few minutes
warm the crusty bread in oven on 375 degrees

It should start looking like this.

Garnish with parsley and grated parmesan. Serve with another bottle of red wine. Enjoy.

I’ll post a picture of the plated Bolognese with fresh parsley and parmesan garnish as soon as it’s ready. Right now I’m sipping prosecco on the back deck with Rosie and Jenny.

the photo came out slightly blurry, but here it is. party of two, your table is ready.